Truth Or Dare

In 2017, Universal Pictures & Blumhouse Productions announced that they’re working on a movie titled, “Truth Or Dare” directed by Katie Couric’s nephew, Jeff Wadlow. (Never Back Down, Kick-Ass 2) For no apparent reason, Universal green-lit the script along with another dud known as “Skyscraper.”

Truth Or Dare was released on April 13th, (on a Friday) 2018. It received negative reviews from critics. Although labeled as a stinker, the film managed to recoup its expenses at the box office. The film’s release date is a metaphor for bad luck.

Before The 2019 Golden Raspberry Awards happen on February 23rd, I want to share my thoughts on what’s good or bad about Truth Or Dare. To tell you the truth, (no pun intended) it’s not nominated at The Razzies.

Today’s review contains pivotal SPOILERS. If you have not seen the film, read at your very own risk. If you wish to view my article, so be it. By the way, a big fat SPOILER involving the ending of Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is mentioned. I’ll do my best not to steal Chris Stuckmann’s (a YouTube film critic) material, because he already did a review of Truth Or Dare.

True & False Aspects

True: Both Lucy Hale (Pretty Little Liars) & Tyler Posey (MTV’s Teen Wolf) did a solid job for their performances.

We learn about the origins of a previous survivor who managed to beat the game by performing a ritual related to sacrifice.

False: Jeff Wadlow did a poor job for directing the film.

The Narrative is nonsensical compared to a human being staring at wet paint for many hours to wait for it to dry.

The concept based on the title game, didn’t seem to fit for a motion picture. Did Jason Blum lose at thumb wrestling by the screenwriter so he can gain notoriety?

Scare Factor never gave me “The Heebie Jeebies.” I didn’t gasp or sweat. Jump Scares are all over the place lacking variation to make me jump outta my seat. Nothing scared me in plain sight. It’s very bad when it comes to horror movies.

Death Scenes never made a big impact on me.

Cinematography suffered from a bad case of Shaky Cam. Does anybody know how to place a camera properly when you’re shooting a scene? I can already picture Speedy Gonzales drinking too much Monster Energy while filming on set.

Main Characters are easily forgettable. None of them are likable or memorable. The only two characters I remember are Lucy Hale’s character, Olivia & Palax.

Palax’s name sounds like an ex-lax brand. His name’s meaningful based on excessive flatulence.

Almost every single character possessed by Palax, smiles like The Joker. If you’re gonna make a compelling villain, don’t make him or her smile too much. Otherwise, they’ll resemble Jack Nicholson’s Joker who poisoned his victims with his brand of “Smylex.” Dial the creepy smile down unless it’s done right. Pennywise The Dancing Clown from Stephen King’s “It” makes it effective, because he & Joker are sociopathic clowns.

Palax is trying to be a combination of villains known for an evil smile including Joker, Green Goblin, Pennywise, Jack Torrence from “The Shining,” Venom, Carnage & Alex from “A Clockwork Orange.”

Poorly rendered Visual Effects “augmented” an actor’s smile to make it resemble Willem Dafoe’s grin. Willem never had his smile digitally enhanced when he played Green Goblin.

A mirror scene obviously rips off that one scene from Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man film with Norman Osborn/Green Goblin talking to himself, followed by a sinister smile. Marvel or Sony, please sue Blumhouse for stealing.

Olivia made a stupid decision for choosing truth in order to question Calax if there’s a way to permanently end the game. What Olivia should’ve done is chose dare, by giving Calax to kill himself. Ever heard of the trope: “Hoist By His Own Petard?” It means the villain is killed by his own invention. I have Double Down this con for insulting my intelligence.

The movie ends with Olivia uploading a video on her YouTube page by telling everyone to play the game so she can save herself from getting killed. Wait a second! Anybody familiar with Maisie Lockwood? You know the little girl from Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom? The Ending from the latter film is kinda similar. Both Olivia & Maisie commenced an apocalypse dooming the human population. EGADS! Universal Pictures might’ve developed a habit for girls with psychopathic tendencies! In my opinion, both girls are one of the worst fictional scumbags of 2018! I have no choice but to Triple Down Lucy’s fatal decision roping everybody to play Truth Or Dare against his or her will!

After the movie ends, a pop song is played during The End Credits. Kinda ruins the atmosphere. What if “Interstellar” ended with an upbeat Dance Number as in “Despicable Me?”

Product Placement featuring brands including YouTube, Apple, Jack Link’s, Facebook, SnapChat, IMessage, IPhone, & Google.

I’m gonna be brutally honest with you guys & gals. I got bored throughout the whole thing. I looked at my phone to see how long this movie is gonna keep me hostage.

The Final Verdict: F, FOR FAKER!

Truth Or Dare is one of the stupidest horror movies I have ever seen. It’s as if this movie suffered from Erectile Dysfunction, due to the inability to “rise” spontaneously. DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT WASTE your spare time on this cluster fudge! If you wanna watch a legit horror film, watch “A Quiet Place.” That’ll keep your blood running through your veins. I cannot wait to see Pennywise delivering his creepy scare tactics “It: Chapter 2.”

Hollywood better not produce “kids games” adapted into films like, “Rock Paper, Scissors,” Hopscotch,” Double Dutch,” “Jump Rope” or anything related to kids playing during recess. To this day, I’m shocked, because The Razzies didn’t nominate Truth Or Dare for “Worst Picture.”

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